~Jus~ My life Sensations - Living it the way i want !

Moving my Blog!!!

2009-11-26T00:33:00.002+08:00

Finally decided to forsake my 'Girly' outlay blog here and migrate to Wordpress instead!!

Will be protecting some 'confidential' or 'not so glam confessions' with passwords so i can express my thoughts freely and dont have to worry about privacy. =)

Friends who are curious to know my 'hidden secrets' can sms me for the password.

If im not writing about you . . most likely i will let you have the password!!

- - - jollyjus.wordpress.com- - -

My reply . .

2009-11-21T14:04:00.006+08:00

I stared at the name in my inbox, hesitated for a moment and took a deep breath before i mustered the courage to open it - an unexpected email from him.

I read and re-read the email a total of 3 times. 3 different sentiments washed over me: -

The first time - my heart took a plunge into my stomach once again as i skim from word to word trying to find out the purpose of this email.

Second time - re-read the email slowly, deciphering word by word, hoping to search for that 'feeling' or was it sincerity? None found.

Third time - No more emotions. Just a painful realization : It's all too late..

I did not reply because i felt there wasn't a need to. But inevitably, an unspoken response was weaved in my heart as i read on...........

Every scattered promise you made and fragment of our future you painted for the past 3 yrs, i picked it up along the way and locked it in my heart, hoping it will be fulfilled someday.

Every word of love we exchanged each night and the love rituals we shared, it kept my heart warm and glowing as i believed they were all true. .

After that night, i did sit down alone and ask myself before: what exactly does this 3 yrs of r/s still mean to me? Is it still worth a 2nd chance?

In hope to find the answer i want, i bared the spot in my heart where i kept all our hopes, happiness and promises gathered over the yrs, trying to reminisce happier times. (something you taught me before.)

Alas, i found that the hopes and promises i registered in have now evolved into nothing but lies, hollow promises and self-delusional happiness. . . From then on, i probably know the reason to look back is Zilch.

Yes, you may feel the heartache now after knowing you've hurt me deep. But believe me, it's only a fraction of the wrench and anguish you put me through.

You know i did try so hard to restrict you in so many ways before, for fear that i will lose you in this way. But much as i tried, the only thing i cant control is your heart and mind - that is exactly where you betrayed me. 心灵上的背叛，也是一种背叛。。

I felt helpless. I can only recognise it as my own failure for not being able to touch and capture you wholly. Therefore, i give up.

Just how many times do you need to promise you will give me your all before you really do?

How many times do i need to tell you : i've put in so much in this r/s, so much so that if i still fail i wont have the courage to love again, before you understand i really mean it?

We've had too many '2nd chance's and 'last time's in our r/s before. We should have known that eventually, the last chance will come and once missed, there will be no more 'next time'.

We've pushed our luck too far and this time, we've finally run out of 'another chance'.

What you say no longer means anything to me anymore. I dont even know which is real.

What's the point of regretting only after you've lost everything? 难道得不到的才是最美的？

When photos become pieces of meaningless papers . . memories become vague flashbacks . .

i can only say ：有些感觉错过了就再也找不回。。

P.s : I did read the email before rejecting you in FB. Knowing u, I do not want to leave behind any memory or hope to be the cause of any unhappiness in ur next r/s.

Therefore, i choose not to be linked to u in anyway.

Stronger and Happier than before!

2009-11-11T22:29:00.000+08:00

Im glad i granted him a last chance to have a talk with me the night before he left for his overseas training.

After much probing from me and a lil' soul searching on his own, he finally told me the truth which i had been so desperately trying to uncover for the past 3yrs. It was something hurtful to know, definitely, which is why he had been trying to hide it from me and delude himself at the same time all this while.

There, i finally got the answer to the questions that were driving me crazy before. And So, I had been quite right when i insisted to him that there must be reasons behind everything he did to hurt me, except that - there was only 1 reason.

That night, I walked out of him (once again), feeling calm and tranquil - as though a big weight was being lifted off my constricted chest. Suddenly, i just dont feel sad anymore!

I guess im a very rational girl, even when it comes to matters of the heart. It's like after knowing what i needed to know from him and re-evaluating the r/s, my mind simply stopped sending signals to my heart to feel emotions like sorrow or pain! SNAP. Just like that.

After that few days of unnecessary self-pitying, i realized there is so much out there waiting for me to experience and take on, rather than just dwell on a failed r/s. Anyway it's his loss, not mine. =)

Thanks to this breakup, a 'mountain tortise' finally emerged from her mountain hole and started a facebook account, not without after much ridicules from her friends. This is something that she had very obediently stayed away from while she was attached. . . but since then, the rest is HISTORY.

I found back lost friends over the years and am looking forward to the many gatherings to come, to rekindle a bond more precious and valuable than just love - F.R.I.E.N.D.S.H.I.P. Yayy... !

Paulyn was right when she said i should take a break and enjoy singlehood after like what, 12 years of being in different R/Ss? Scary.. it's like i had been bounded by a virtual noose hanging around my neck for the past 12 yrs ready to strangle me whenever i did something out of the "Good Girlfriend" guidelines / rules. Now, is definitely freedom for me. .

Actually i have this bad habit of ignoring calls or msgs when i dont feel like it, depending on my mood or when im mentally or physically preoccuppied. Now is the period when i do it most often because i just dont have to be accountable to anyone so i dont bother to check my phone very often. Haha.. sorry people... i do that randomly to anyone so no hard feelings if i missed to answer or reply you!! =)

Another change for me is that i totally have the freedom to choose the people i wish to meet up with or the things i wanna do these days. ! Some plans i have for the coming weeks are : to meet up with gal/guy friends for dinners and catch up sessions, to go jb with J for seafood and massage, then go blading and try fishing with Natty . . followed by ktv sessions . . MJ sessions with new found khakiz in office. . and hopefully amongst all activities, i can squeeze out some time to shop for a new bed and wardrobe for celebrating ME moving home!

Me: Mommy. . i want to buy a new wardrobe for my clothes and a new bed! (excited)

Mum: Dont waste money la.. later after awhile dunno moving where again...

Me: -_-" wah liew..

I guess after 12 yrs of being in a r/s, even my mum dont believe i can stay single for long. Kaoz.! Anyhow, im pretty sure of myself that i do not want to be committed in a r/s again any time soon. I MEAN IT!!! Right after i declare im single, there are guys expressing their intentions already.. and i think i really must have done alot of gd deeds in my previous life, to enable a humble gal like myself now, deserve such special attention and treatments from anyone. =)

However, too much of these special treatments at this time actually makes me feel rather uneasy and wanna avoid an otherwise, amiable r/s instead. So to put it simpler, i actually feel more comfortable and prefer to go out with guy friends who wont let me feel this pressure that they wanna bring our friendship to the next level la.. Swee?

Off to slp now and tomorrow will be my first gathering with some of my fav girls in Sec Sch. . excited!!

My greatest fall . . 原来爱情这么伤

2009-11-04T18:43:00.000+08:00

I felt my heart cringed and dropped.. i cried so hard i didn't know how to stop.

It's been 3 days and i still feel the pain. I guess this time, it will take me a long long time to recover from this because - i've forgotten how to be the heartless gal who can move on from one r/s to another so fast i didn't have the time to really feel the sadness from a post-breakup before.

This is the first time for me, but maybe the last too. I will let myself immerse in this sadness and i will remember it as a lesson learnt. When i finally pick myself up, im never gonna let myself be vulnerable to such feelings again.

Too much emotions and thoughts have been gushing through me these few days that at times, i hope i can burst like a bubble and just vanish into thin air. Disappointment . . anger . . sadness . . loneliness . . let it vanish too.

Now, i really dread the quiet nights when i lay in bed because that's when my mind conjures up images of the past that make me feels weak . .those happy memories . . the scene where he asked for forgivness and a chance to make it up. . i almost wanted to forgive him and give us another chance.

But the moment i open my eyes and remember the night when i found out he had betrayed my trust, those lies that he blatantly shouted in my face just so recently keeps ringing in my ear. Every word of it.

How can you be so outright and even raised your voice when you hurl a lie at me in my face?
How can you just brush every lie you said and every thing you did behind me off so lightly with a simple phrase : i cant remember i did it. These are the questions burning my heart.

He didn't even bother to remember the reason why he did those things when he clearly knew it would hurt me. He didn't even bother to explain. He didn't have the courage to admit his true feelings or the wrongs that he did and he certainly don't feel how much all these matters to me.

Much as i cant bear to, i really dont know how i can accept this r/s again.

Maybe it is a gd thing he is going overseas soon for a period of time. I will learn to get use to life without him and learn to move on..

有一天终于打完
思念的一场战
回过头再看一看
原来爱情那么伤
下次还会不会这样 . . .

Taipei Trip : 06 May ~ 12 May (Part 1)

2009-06-19T22:02:00.000+08:00

!Warning: This is a photo heavy post

Day 1: Mommy, Grandma and Da Yi came to the airport to send us off that day.

Though it wasn't the first time we were travelling, but still it felt good to see Mommy fussing over our trip... =)

(Farewell at Changi Airport)

Arriving at TPE airport, we bought a 台湾大哥大 prepaid card each so it would be more convenient to contact each other and a lot more cheaper for me to call/sms Darling as well. =)

Tip: The booth selling prepaid card is located on the right end of the airport after we collect our baggage and pass through the Exit. Personally i feel the staff there are extremely friendly and helpful in explaining how to install the SIM card/ making international and local calls.

Next, we lugged our bulky baggage all the way across to the extreme left end where the booths selling coach tickets are located at.

I can't remember how much the tickets cost exactly but it was really cost-saving for us since we definitely have to split into 2 cabs considering the size of our luggages. =)

Tip: Look out for the 飛狗巴士 booth. They offer cheap 2-way tickets that drops off/pick up at your hotel doorstep. Very convenient and reliable!

Our chosen accomodation for the 7 days was: Future Star Hotel (明日大饭店)http://www.futurestarhotel.com.tw/

Kudos to Sis and Ivy for doing the research and booking of our rooms. It was not a very convenient task as this motel only accepts phone bookings and allow us to book up to a max of 1 month in advance. This small and family-style motel provides clean rooms which gave us a very pleasant and comfortable feeling. The Aunties at the reception were also very friendly and helpful, making our stay there very much enjoyable.

(A bunch of tired looking people: Daniel, Ivy, Me & Sis!)

We finally managed to have a proper meal at the nearby -Grill House- after checking into our hotel.. Yummy baked pasta! Actually.. cheesy baked stuff has never been the kind of food i'll order off menus as i do not like cheese. But alas, everything on the menu was cheese-baked (what a misleading cafe name!).

Was it my hunger or was the food really nice? I actually gobbled it all down and thought i did like it!

We had a quick shop around Ximending area after that and i bought a top, a pair of tights and gladiator heels.. (only to regret it during the later days after shopping at places like WuFenPu/Shilin and realized we had been 'chopped'. Kwa kwa kwa...)

Day 2: Shopping at WuFenPu / Raohe Night Market / 彩虹桥

A hungry me.. walking around impatiently under the hot summer sun, trying to find a decent cafe to settle lunch. It was already noon time then but apparently, the shops at Ximending do not open so early.

As you can see from the pictures, the food looks awfully plain. Not only that, it tasted horrible too. I chose this cafe with the crave for some Japanese food. But sadly, i was served with Chinese-fake-Japanese dishes.. My chawanmushi tasted like the chinese plain steam egg.. and best of all, my udon was like "Yong Tau Fu" noodles soup.. ! No joke! Boo.. I cant help but sulked at my food. * Do remember the name of this place and don't ever attempt to order any Japanese cuisine here.*

After lunch, we took our time to head down to Wufenpu by train since it was still early.
Well, while some people may say: Early bird gets to eat the worm, I'll say : Early bird in Wufenpu gets to sniff in the Dust!!
It's true ok! Shops were only starting to open when we reached around 1.30pm - lifting of shutter doors and shop owners throwing out bags after bags of clothes for display sent whirls of dust that made us choke and sputter.

Conclusion and lesson learnt from this experience is: Being an early bird at this Wufenpu garment wholesale market only means sniffing in clouds of dust and hard to bargain for price..

After 5hrs of wandering through the 'wholesale maze', we finally got out of it and met up with Ivy & Daniel's friends residing in TPE. They brought us to the nearby Rao He Night Market bustling with stalls selling mouth-watering street snacks!

"Pretty women.. walking down the street.."

Our "Mr Nice Guy"s . .

Eat Away . .

After eating, we took a walk to 彩虹桥. It was a very romantic place with dim lightings and many couples were sitting by the river hugging each other tightly as the wind blowing was soooo cold. How i wished Darling was with me right there and then..instead, i could only make a call to him while standing on top of the bridge, to describe the place and tell him how much i missed him! Sweet of me eh? =p

A bunch of tired people with nothing to do... coming up with something...

.

.

Gals: Hey Look at that!

Girls: The bridge looks so romantic..

Girls: Take a picture for us leh..
Guys: Hmm.. what can we do leh?

Guys: Aha.. watch us!

Guys: We are cycling under a romantic bridge.. haha!*****************************End of our nonsense****************************

Lastly, a picture of me and sis on the Rainbow bridge to end the post.

Shall post the remaining pictures from the trip in Part 2. Stay tuned!

My Obsessions . .

2009-06-16T20:24:00.000+08:00

Okay, i know i have not been blogging for almost a month and i still have my pictures from my trip that i've been wanting to share but do not have the time to do so.

I've been putting off so many things i want to do because of this addictive obsession - Mahjong.

Everyone who knows me should know im so addicted to it..and the only reason i did not play so often in the past was because Darling wasn't keen in it and did not approve of me playing it so often. And so, my MJ sessions were only limited to weekends.

Ahem. . But i can safely pronounce it as history now because.. ever since Darling joined us once and won a few hundred bucks, it seemed his heart had been 'bought' over by MJ ever since. =P As a result, we are playing it almost every alternate day now although we have to work the next day! Crazy isn't it?

Of course, this wouldn't have been possible without a bunch of just as MJ-crazed khakiz.. Haha..

Im really not surprised that nowadays, i often receive calls from Darling asking me to play MJ after work. It's becoming his obsession as well.. lalala.. i knew no one can resist the thrill of MJ and i cant be more happy to welcome Darling to join me too! Keke..

The other lethal obsession of mine is of course non other than . . . . *drumroll* . . . BAGS! Yay! Remember the GUCCI bag that i said i wanted to buy at the airport during my trip? Well, I didn't manage to see it at the airport so i insisted on going Orchard the following weekend after i came back just to buy it.

And so i chalked up a hefty sum of $1670 on my CC bill to get the GUCCI Full Moon bag as a birthday gift for myself this year . . =)

But guilty to say, that's not the only gift im buying for myself this year. Whilst my Gucci baby is still wrapped up nicely, sitting in the paper bag waiting for me to use it in July, i bought just another Burberry tote yesterday. Thanks to dear Malia who has a friend working in DFS to help me buy it at a 30% discounted rate. ~Teehee~

Will post up a pic of my Burberry baby once i get it tomorrow!

Pic of Gucci baby -> (mine is actually without the charm as this pic is taken off the Internet. But.. but.. im thinking maybe i should get a Prada bear charm to go with mine? Or would anyone like to give me as a B'dae gift? Hehe... maybe i should put it down on my wishlist.)

Aren't they cute??
Some random pics. . .

My 2 precious boys - Draven & Elson

(See how happy Draven is carrying his baby brother)

*I simply adore baby Elson*

Collage of my camwhoring Pics

Attending Annual D & D with Darling. .

While he was away . .

2009-05-26T23:14:00.000+08:00

Im used to being stirred from my sleep by Darling's morning call. . .

Toothpaste set on my toothbrush by the basin,

Breakfast long prepared and packed into my bag,

Ribena / Honey filled up in my water bottle will be chilled in the fridge and ready for me to grab as i leave the house.

Working late has never been a concern, not when i know he will be waiting to fetch me after a long hard day at work,

Waiting to greet me with a sweet kiss and perks up my spirits for the rest of the evening.

Dinner will be seen to as well, the only thing i need to think of/worry about is what and where to eat for that evening.

Finally, yet another day shall pass as i snuggle up against his warm body and slip into his embrace, falling into a safe deep sleep. . .

*************************************************************************************

Oh no, i miss Darling so much and it's only the 2nd day he's away. There's another 3 more days to bear with before i can see him or hear from him again.

I never realize what a blissful and pampered life i have, till now that he's away. .

Yesterday - I had to walk briskly to the MRT station in the morning so that i can squeeze out some time to buy breakfast for myself.

Then at 5.30pm, i was so worried and flustered cause i knew i was going to miss our company transport and there will be no one to fetch me. Luckily, Malia gave me a lift to White Sands and Nel's hubby had night class on so we could have a nice dinner together.

Today - I was shocked and jumped out of bed when Darling's mommy woke me up at 8am (and work starts at 8.30am)! Without Darling's morning call, i just slept through my alarm. Damn. I was freaking late and sneaked into the office at 9am with no breakfast.. Work was crazily hectic and i couldn't stop replying emails since i stepped into office. With no filled water bottle beside me and no time to even make myself a cuppa, i went without food and water for the whole morning till 1pm! Then at 5.30pm, i hastily wrapped up my work so i could rush and catch the co. bus...leaving the pending work to yet another hectic morning tmorrow...

Sigh... what a nightmare..! When Darling made his last call to me this afternoon before his phone had to be kept away till Fri, he had to remind me to drink more water and take my dinner. Yes, these things need to be reminded because he knows that his lazy gf will not bother to drink much water or even take dinner if he isn't around to ensure that everything is made convenient for me. Haha. And sure my Darling understands me well... ! =P

Well, the only positive thing about Darling being away is that i can have some private time for myself to do things like blogging, listening to music + slap on a mask and do some quiet reading (which i really enjoy but Darling keeps disturbing me when he's around)..

Hopefully i will have time during these few days to do the post on my Taiwan trip which is going to be a long one for sure..

Gd night!

"Love is missing someone whenever you’re apart, but somehow feeling warm inside because you’re close in heart.."

Recount of my car crash experience..

2009-05-15T22:11:00.000+08:00

The last 2 days had been a post-trauma recovery period for me - both physically and mentally.

13 May - 0020hrs

Just when i was exuberantly describing my trip to Darling on my way home from airport, Darling suddenly stepped hard on the car brake.

I was jolted out of my speech and turned front to see what had caused him to brake so hard suddenly. All i could see was that the car in front had suddenly come to a stop in our lane (on the PIE) and with the speed (at least more than 100km/hr) we were going, Darling will never make it to stop in time.

Not being able to think in my state of shock, i could only scream. Whatever happened next was so fast and felt as if in a daze. I cringed into my seat while Darling tried to dodge and swerve to the left lane but brushed against the side of another fast coming car. Having no way to avoid the ultimate crash, he swerved back and hit right into the stationary car - hard.

First was the big "BANG" from the hit, then the cranking of crushing metal followed by the shattering of window glasses. Finally, everything ended with a dead silence.

I realised i had been too shocked to react in the whole process that i didn't even blink. And so, I witnessed the collision, the crushing of the car and shattered glasses hitting the front window like pelting rain.

Finally, i got out of my trance when i heard Darling's familiar voice anxiously asking me if i was hurt.. i was so relieved to know both of us was safe and immediately asked my sister sitting at the rear passenger behind me if she was alright too.

But what i heared totally unnerved me and made me panic. She was crying in pain while saying "我的手断了" You may say i have a wild imagination but the first image that came to my mind when i heard that was a bloody arm being detached from her body with bone jutting out.
I almost fainted and could feel my limbs went weak on the spot. Yet at the same time, my sisterly instinct told me i have to stay composed and call for help instead of breaking down. And so, i fumbled for my phone while trying to comfort my sister telling her not to be afraid as i'll call for the ambulance. But in actual fact, i was so scared myself that my trembling fingers took so bloody long to even press 3 numbers - 995 correctly on my touchscreen phone!!

After successfully giving the operator our location and informing my worried parents on our situation, i finally turned back and checked on her condition.

I was so darn relieved when i saw her arm still adjoined to her body.. Phew! If she had used the word 'fracture' appropriately instead, i wouldn't have got so flustered and turned into jelly limbs lah.. Kns.

Anyway it was after i got out of the car to check on Darling, who was talking to the stupid front car driver that i realised i was feeling giddy and nausea myself. I went over to the road shoulder to puke and soon after, the efficient ambulance and my parents arrived.

We were sent to the hospital with my worried Mommy beside us in the ambulance. I felt so sad and heartbroken to see her grave and pale worried face looking at us. She was so shaken when i told her about the accident over the phone that she cried and exclaimed "Oh my poor children... where are you all now..."

I will never forget these words, her weak and urgent tone, and her sad face when she saw us. They have all expressed her unspoken overwhelming love for us and the pain inflicted on her own heart to see her precious daughters injured. And then, i solemnly vow to myself that i will take very gd care of myself and not let my mommy worry like that again.

************************************************************************************

Anyway, the pain in my neck and down my spine are getting better now and i hope my poor sister can quickly get used to doing things using only 1 hand while her left arm is still in cast.

It is most unfortunate that i have to blog about my accident instead of my memorable trip right after i came back. But anyway emotionally, i still need time to get over this before i can have the right mood to blog about happier stuff. >.<

I really hope Daddy wont be angry anymore and unjustly reproach Darling for getting us into an accident. I also really really hope my family can be more understanding that nobody had anticipated such a thing to happen and all i can say is: Shit happens. If anyone has to be accountable for it, then i should say all of us had our part in it.

Some thoughts that have been running through my mind these few days:

If i had not rambled on my trip to Darling that night, would he have concentrated more on driving and took ECP instead of PIE which was actually the nearer route to my house?

If the front driver had a gd vision and was alert enough, would he not have noticed the prominent fallen tree branch blocking our lane and still travelled on that lane till such a close distance before he deicded to e-brake?

If Darling had travelled at a slower speed, could he have prevented the accident from happening?

If Sis had fastened the seat belt at the rear seat, would she have avoided the mishap of her broken arm and spared my parents from the worrying?

I guess everything was destined that it happened this way but one lesson learnt and to be shared to everyone is: Pls put on your seat belt even if you are sitting at the rear passenger seat. It may save your life.!

A day before departure

2009-05-05T23:49:00.000+08:00

To all my dear friends: If you need me to get something for you in Taiwan, do sms me before 12th May okie!

Im so very excited about my trip now.. took a long time to plan the itinerary over the weekend and transported my whole wardrobe back from Darling's place just to pack for my 7 days trip. Haha.. super kua zhang but dont care la. I wanna make sure im looking fabulous and yet feeling comfy for the trip!

Dearie Angeline prepared a sumptious dinner for me on Sun and i had a great time playing with my 2 godsons. Elson is growing up into a cute chubby little baby with big sparkling eyes. This tiny infant is so full of smiles and i simply adore him to bits..!
Little Draven on the other hand, is becoming more and more like a little tyrant. But still, this mischievious boy does know how to take care of his baby brother. I was so touched that day when i saw him knelt down to look at baby Elson and suddenly, picked up a hanky and started dabbing away his drooling saliva. What a sweet gesture from a 2 yr old boy!!
(gotta post up photos of these 2 precious boys when im back from my trip..)

After work today, Darling brought me to a nice dinner at MANPUKU - Tampines One. The interior of the restaurant was unexpectantly big with a Japanese food hall concept that offers Japanese cuisine in a Japanese gourmet street setting.
Our stomach was super bloated after devouring sushi, ramen, Japanese grill, Okonomiyaki and the most Yummilicious Chawanmushi you mut try!
(photos to be updated too...)

Im off to join Darling in lala land now.. keke.. i told him i needed to use the laptop to check my mails just for a while. In the end he got so bored that he fell asleep while waiting and here i am, blogging away instead of cuddling with him in bed...

Luckily, his snores tells me that he wont be waking up any time soon to notice im still up... =X

Looking back & Look forward to ..

2009-04-30T19:22:00.000+08:00

Hmm.. it's been some time since i last blogged. Each time i switched on the laptop plannning to blog, i ended up surfing the net and spreeing again.

But since today is the last day of April, i'd better take some time to recollect my thoughts/memories and post them up before the start of a new month!

Looking back:

1. I've broke all my previous promises to Darling and now, i officially owe my hands to him since he magnanimously spare me from chopping them off.. yet! Sigh.

2. I finally completed my Tree Top Walk, the whole 7km of it last week! This time with the cool weather, our journey was much more enjoyable. We half -jogged and half-trekked our way up steep slopes before reaching the top of the canopy. It felt great and relaxing to be standing so high above, taking in deep breaths of fresh air while admiring the serene nature. But being afraid of heights, crossing the suspension bridge was rather scary as it sways slightly with our movements. On the other end of the bridge, the return journey consisted of endless flights of steps that made my legs went wobbly and i almost tripped and fell.

3. Life's been great so far for the past weeks. R/s with Darling has been incredibly sweet this month and for the first time in many months, we did not have any quarrel in the last 30days! Haha.. You may think what's there to rave about in such a trivial..minor..little triumph. But to me, it's like breaking the curse of Murphy's law where something bad is bound to happen and cause us huge fights every month, whenever we were at our sweetest period. How long can this last? ..... I wonder.

On the other hand, there are also no major issues at work to upset me recently and I even got my bonus today despite the current market downturn. Well..just in time to give me a little more to spend during my Taiwan trip next week!! Hooray!

Look forward to:

1. I can't wait to fast forward the days to 06 May, when i'll be off for my 1 week holiday in Taipei! I simply love to go for holidays and for a change this time, i wont be travelling with Darling. It'll be just my sister, her hostel mate - Ivy, Ivy's boyfriend and me! Over at Taipei, i'll meet up with Ah Heng who happens to be going with his girlfriend during the same period as us. How coincidental is that and im sure it'll be fun to get together in a foreign country! The more the merrier! ^_^

2. Im also keeping my fingers crossed now that i might be able to get the Gucci bag i've been eyeing on at the airport cheaper... and with dear Feli's friend helping me to get my LV wallet from Europe, i should be able to fulfill 2 items from my Wishlist by May!! *praying really hard that both items wont be out of stock then*

This weekend is gonna be a busy weekend for me - going for my facial appointment which i've been putting off for weeks, pack my luggage, discuss and finalize itinerary for the trip, not forgetting to spend some quality time with Darling before i leave him for a week and hopefully i can still squeeze out some time to meet up with Angeline too.

Some pics of my other shopping loots accquired recently and off to prepare for another night of clubbing at Dragonfly!

Enjoy your long weekend everyone!

Im touched.. - by an advertisement

2009-04-19T00:32:00.000+08:00

Do you often complain about your partner's snores that caused your sleepless nights?

Have you ever got so irritated by the snores you want to kick him out of bed?

Now think, what if one day he is no longer around anymore... would it be these sounds that you miss before you sleep? Would you rather wish to be tortured by his snores than to sleep alone in a cold quiet bed?

Funeral

"In the end, it's these small things that you remember.. the little imperfections that make them perfect for you..."

God.. i was so shaken by the speech that i teared the first time i saw this advertisement. It relates so aptly that I can't imagine if one day i will never get to hear Darling's snores beside me again..

When Darling came into the room, i hugged him tightly and related the whole advertisement to him with teary eyes and quivering tone..... i told him i would not mind him snoring at night again, as long as i feel his pressence beside me. I mean it.

I love this ad. It awakened my senses and awareness to the people around me, especially my loved ones.

I realized i have been too complacent in my life that sometimes, i take them for granted.

Easily, we complain about or quarrel with someone we love just because what they do did not favour us. It also seems easier to rake up past mistakes and point out shortcomings then remembering the little things that they did or changed for you.

As im saying this, i suddenly thought of a very good example in my life:

Darling gets up earlier each morning to make breakfast and fills up my bottle with different drinks for me to bring to work. It becomes a routine that i expect him to do for me everyday and took it for granted. Sometimes, i complained that the bread was toasted too hard and other times, i complained that the drink was not sweet enough for my liking. I do not thank him every day for preparing breakfast for me but instead, when he occassionally missed it as he was late for work, i'll be grouchy that i do not have anything to eat for that morning.

Surely, this will be one of the small things he did for me that i'll remember if one day he is no longer around. But for now while im still enjoying it, why is it that i neglect to cherish and be thankful for it everyday?

I believe im not the only one guilty of this.

Most of us often don't cherish the people around us and appreciate the things they've done for us till they are gone. Only when the person is no longer around, it'll be the good things that floods back to your memory and somehow, for those minor things that you ever complained about in the past, you wouldn't mind it anymore if you could have him/her back in your life once again.

Life is short and fragile. We should cherish every moment and everyone that played a part in ours.

So recently, i keep reminding Darling: Life is so fragile.. you better cherish me, love me more and treat me better now. If not if i suddenly die one day you will cry and regret lor..

I promise i will complain less and appreciate more from now on!

Our 29 Month Anniversary Day

2009-04-13T20:24:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was me and Darling's 29th-month anniversary day!

No gifts, flowers or special celebration.

Just a new Anniversary neo-print sticker and sweet sms to add to our collection - our simple love rituals to mark this special day every month. =)

Though it may seem childish or old fashion to some, but i cherish them alot. Darling and i have come a long way overcoming so many problems and surviving so many quarrels/breakups.

These sms we sent on our anniversary days expressed our thoughts and feelings there and then based on what we went through that month. They are precious because they are unique and each word is heartfelt, with meaning known only by us.

When i look through them again now, i see the hope and love we held so dear in this r/s which is why we managed to celebrate our 29 months together yesterday despite the frequent quarrels. (^_^)

Darling always motivates me by saying: the greatest couples are those who always quarrel but manage to overcome and learn a lesson from it. I totally agree.

We may have quarrelled almost every month, so much so that many people think we wont last long. But look where we are now. We are still together, our bond stronger than ever because we have thrashed out whatever differences and unhappiness we have. Most importantly, having lost and revive the r/s again & again, we know just how important we mean to each other.

You are irreplaceable Darling.. Happy Anniversary ! *Smooches*

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Another thing to be happy about yesterday was that i finally ditched my lousy handphone and got a new one!! Say goodbye to my HTC Touch Diamond and hello.... Samsung Ultra Touch!

I've been bearing with the lousy HTC phone for months, taking either 'orangy' or blurry photos because it doesn't have camera flash. Sucks.

But now, hey hey.. i've got a new 8.0 mega pixel phone with 16M color display which makes the quality of the pictures taken as gd as a camera! I'll be able to capture quality pictures to share in my blog from now on.. Hooray!

Okay, i spent another $198 for this phone after trading in the HTC phone for $300. But it's definitely worth it. Other than that, i also invested $98.80 in a new mask - the Oxymask, recommended by TV program - 女人我最大. Though it may be a little costly for a 50ml bottle, but still, i personally feel that the price is justifiable with the effects and results from using it. =)

For those who don't mind the price, you should definitely try it!

My new Samsung Ultra Touch:

Oxymask:

Easter Holiday - a long weekend !

2009-04-11T15:14:00.000+08:00

Yeah.. finally there's a long weekend to rest. And rest i will, because i said i wont go 'walk walk' anymore till my Taiwan trip.

Thursday night, we went clubbing at Dragonfly. Hmm, it's been 4 months since i last went clubbing (at LUXY - Taipei)! Clubbing used to be one of my favourite activity on weekend besides Mahjong because i like to drink and dance.

But now, with age catching up and not having had any alcohol intake for the past 4 mths, i got high after a mere few glasses of Hennessy. The gd thing out of it is, Darling could not ask me to drive him back that night. He had to keep himself sober while i continue to intoxicate myself with alcohol and dance the night away.. hehe.. =P

Darling left me to dance with the gals and stood at a distance, chatting away with his friends. Unexpectedly, a guy came up and hit on me. I tried to warn him im with my boyfriend, but i guess he couldn't hear me over the blaring the music so he didn't retreat.

Luckily, Stephanie came to my rescue by pushing him away, exclaiming: SOrriee.....! SOrrieee....! Haha. The guy looked stunned and Stephanie looked so cute and funny i couldn't stop giggling.

Darling's friends standing around immediately alerted him and he swarmed over with the other guys once they caught words and glared at the guy who happened to walk past again.

Guys. I think you should always observe your prey and make sure they are available before you make your move. Most importantly, never never prey in the lions den or you'll soon find yourself become the prey.

Darling: Wah... got people come and know you ar.. (sarcastic tone)
Me: Ya lah.. who ask you leave me here alone.
Darling: I was talking to them ma..
Me: then people think im single and alone here ma.

For the rest of the night, Darling was just an arm's length from me.. =P I love the protective look on him, the way he hugged me to claim his possession and stood in front of me to block me from others while i dance.

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I woke up with a hangover yesterday so i rested at home till evening before going over to Angeline's place for Mahjong with Amelia and Angeline's MIL. I miss seeing my little Draven.. !

This little godson of mine is so mischievious and unfortunately, he has also taken a liking to Mahjong like his Mommy and Godmother. Once we set up the table and chairs, he would climb up and take his seat, waiting for the game to start. Haha.. so smart lor.

He would sit on his Angeline's lap and after each game, helped to wash the tiles which is his favourite part because he can mess up the tiles. When the next game starts, he would get bored and went off to play. Once he heard us washing the tiles again, he would run back calling: Mommy! Mommy! and attempted to climb back to her lap so he could join in. Cute.!

Well, the game ended at 3am with me being the biggest loser - $260. After that game, i added another activity into my forbidden list. I promised Darling i will take a break from Mahjong till i come back from Taiwan. I know he is happy now because he doesn't like me to play Mj in the first place. *Sigh*

But what am i going to do now on weekends without 'walk walk' and Mj?

Hehe.. i found an equally fulfilling but destructive alternative. *grins*

While Darling was out today, i something bad. I checked my email and saw an invitation to join one of my favourite sprees - Joyceshop.

No harm browsing i thought.

Oh no.. so many nice clothes for the new season...

I thought i would leave those items i like in a new tab and short list them later. Ended up, i got 7 shortlisted items. Shit. I tried to remind myself i just lost $260 last night... but it didn't work.

While my mind was still thinking, my fingers were already working on the keyboard going through the familiar process - copy, paste, copy paste.. I spent another $119 online shopping!

When Darling came back, he thought i was learning the lyrics of some new songs.

But i confessed. He said he will have to chop off my hands to stop me from buying.. keke..

Off to prepare and go out with Darling now. He is the one who suggested to go walk walk at Suntec and Marina Square this time.

But i promised myself i am so not going to buy anymore clothes or shoes. Just to be safe, i asked Darling to control me and keep reminding me im a poor gal if i want to buy anything later.

We shall see if it works.... =)

Sunday Treat : Shopping

2009-04-06T19:40:00.000+08:00

I complained to Darling that i feel he doesn't love me anymore.. again. This time because he didn't bring me out on weekend!

Okay, to be specific, i mean he didn't bring me out to 'walk walk' (aka shopping) for the past 2 weeks! (Last wk we went HSBC Tree Top to feed mosquitoes and the week before we went Carrefour to shop for DVD players / sound system and groceries but that's not counted to me. =P)

So yesterday, he got no choice but to abide to my wish... hehe..it works~ *wink*

Chosen Venue: Bugis Junction

Objective: To buy a new shawl

Budget for the day: $100

On our journey to Bugis junction...

Darling: Really wanna go Bugis meh, there so boring and nothing to shop. Should go Suntec or Orchard ma..

Me : Just nice for me wat.. i dont want to spend so much money and things in Suntec and Orchard more expensive.

But in the end... it seems smaller area doesn't mean lesser things to buy.. ; P

Evaluation

Total spending: $337

Things bought: 2 shawls, 1 dress, 1 pair of heels, 1pair of pink sandals, 1 Dior liquid foundation, 1 Dior Concealer, 1 BB cream, 2 sets of fake lashes, Fake lash applicator and a book.

Without saying, i was a very happy poor gal that day.

Happy because i know my Darling loves me very much and is willing to do anything for me that makes me smile.

But im also $337 poorer..

My confessions -

I know i should not be shopping now because im going on a 7-day shopping trip in Taipei early May.

I know i should be saving up for my trip now instead of spending my money like water.

I know majority of the stuff i bought, i do not really need them.

I know i just bought 2 tops, 3 dresses and 2 skirts online which i haven't receive so I really shouldn't be buying anymore clothes.

I know i already have too many pairs of footwear, that's why i often keep my new shoes away and simply forgot i ever own them!

I definitely also know that Darling's wardrobe is running out of space to hold my expanding range of clothes.

I know.. i know.. i should not be going for anymore walk walk in shopping centres. Perhaps i ought to go for more real long walks like the HSBC Tree Top walk which is free and healthy!!

Haiz, seeing my own confessions above really makes me feel remorseful.. (at least for now.)

Therefore i hereby proclaim: NO MORE SHOPPING ... at least till 1 week before my Taiwan trip. (Just in case i need to get some additional wear to bring along ma.. )

Nuff said for today.

Pic of me before going out and my precious loots:

HSBC Tree Top Walk

2009-03-30T21:07:00.000+08:00

I woke up today with bodyaches all over and red mosquitoe-bite marks on my thigh. Reason - The aftermath of my unforgettable hike to the HSBC Tree Top Walk yesterday.

HSBC Tree Top Walk

(Yes, it was the picture of this magnificent bridge that lured me to this hike.)

Description:
The HSBC TreeTop Walk (HSBC TTW) is the highlight of several long hiking routes in MacRitchie that brings you through different stages of mature secondary forest. The first of its kind in Singapore and in the region, this free-standing suspension bridge connects the two highest points (Bukit Peirce and Bukit Kalang) in MacRitchie and offers a bird's eye view of the community of plants and animals that live in the forest canopy. The total length of the walkway is about 250m and its height from the forest floor varies, with the highest point at 25m.

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Recommended by Felicia, i have never knew such a place / bridge existed in Singapore. I was thrilled by the height of the suspension bridge and intrigued by the scenery that one could view from it. Hence, me and Darling set out for the adventure hike yesterday.

Unfortunately, it was drizzling when we reached MacRitchie. But we were adamant to carry on with our plan and parked the car at Venus Drive, which was 2.5km away from the Tree top walk. The whole round trip is about 7 - 10km but since we did not manage to complete it, our entire route yesterday only covered about 5km.

Having not done enough research and underestimating the nature of the route, Darling asked me to wear anything that's comfortable will do. He chose to wear sandals himself and luckily for me, i wore a pair of cheap shoes from BKK which im ready to part with.

Initially, the canopy of the trees was enough to shelter us from the rain drops. But halfway through, the rain got heavier and we had to use the umbrella. Finally, as the condition got worse, we found it difficut to carry on and Darling decided to stop the hike as it was dangerous to walk under the trees with thunder and lightning.

We managed to sneak into the country club beside the trail route where we seek shelter for the next 2hrs. By the time we carried on with the hike, it was already 5..20pm which was past the closing time of the tree top walk.

Not wanting to give up halfway and stubbornly thinking that we should at least go to the bridge and take some photos, we continued the rest of the last kilometer. After climbing a very steep slope, panting like mad, we finally arrived at the opening of the bridge - only to find it blocked by a hut which has been locked by the park rangers after closing time! I couldn't even see the other end of the bridge or at least have a peek of the scenary below it. Damn pissed off ok! Knn lor.. all my energy and sweat to come all the way in the end i didnt get to see anything... @#$%!

The only encounter that made the trip a little more worthwhile was sighting this cute monkey sitting on ground along in our path. Looking more closely, we realized that there were so many monkeys playing on the tree directly outside the rangers station!

The rest of the journey back was a total nightmare - the only route out was blocked by fallen branch, trail was flooded and slippery, spider webs washed down by the rain stuck onto our body as we walked past and eerie crickets chirping loudly..

I almost wanted to cry when Darling said we had to walk through the overgrown grasses and wet shrubs as our way out was blocked by the fallen branches. Dragged by him, i screamed and jumped my way through. Can you imagine how disgusting it is? Im totally terrified of insects and kept worrying that a hidden snake might bite me!

Just when i thought it's the end of my misery, we were greeted by a long meandering flooded trail. Ha. Great. There was no other way out and no room to be afraid of getting dirty. Taking a deep breath, i waded through the muddy water till we got out.

This picture best illustrates the last part of my journey. It was indeed my closest ever encounter with Mother nature. But despite the scary experience, i would still want to go back again next time to complete the whole 7km! But this time, i'll make sure i protect myself with insect repellent, proper cross training shoes and most importantly, choose a fine sunny day! =P

Marriage and Babies

2009-03-26T22:40:00.000+08:00

Darling has got to work late today so i got plenty of time to spend by myself. Having no one to fetch me from work, i had to rush to finish my work on time so i could catch our company transport to leave the ulu working place im in.

Luckily i had Nel for company today. She was once my best shopping khakiz but now, with her current physical state, it's hard to have her with me on one of those shopping marathon again. Over dinner, we chatted on the topic that is currently hot favourite in my age group circle - pregnancy.

It is hard cold fact that friends of my age are mostly happily married and moving on to the next stage of their life by now. But me? Other than the occasional reminders from my bio-clock that i should be following suit, im perfectly happy with being single, But, unavailable of course. I enjoy spending 二人世界with Darling, leading a carefree life doing things we enjoy like travelling as often as we can, diving at different islands / countries and explore other activities that we may pick up together.

One by one, i witness my best friends getting married and giving birth. It always touches me to see them walking down the red aisle, hand in hand with the love of their life. The blissful look they exude and tears of joy they shed, makes me long for the day when i could experience it for myself with the one i finally entrust my happiness with.

But watching them through the process of giving birth to the parenting stage on other hand, have caused an adverse effect on me. The amount of sacrifices they have to make in the process of pregnancy like poor complexion, weight gain, mood swings, morning sickness, and the greater responsibilities that followed after giving birth makes it seem all too much for me to take.

5yrs ago, I used to think i like kids and even hoped to be a young mommy. But 5 yrs later, i know i actually meant i like playing with other people's babies and toddlers but im definitely not ready to be a Mum yet! Luckily i already have 2 precious godsons - Draven and Elson for me to shower my love on and learn how difficult parenting can be. It is also through them that i realized im still not ready because each time they cry for too long, it makes me feel so helpless and vexed that i wanna run away from them.! I really admire how Angeline can juggle them both at the same time....

Enough thoughts for today.. off to catch my slp and be ready for a long day at work tomorrow.

Collage of Valentines' Day pics:

Taiwan Trip - Dec 08

2009-03-22T12:07:00.000+08:00

It's been a long time since my first blog.. this time i've been exploring how to make nice collages out of my photo collection and my first masterpiece was for the most recent trip to Taipei in dec last yr!!

It was a 6D5N trip Christmas trip with 2 other couple friends and the time spent there simply passed in a whizz...

Day 1

We took an afternoon flight on Eva Air and by the time we reach there, the sky was already dark though it was only 6plus in the evening! Well, it was winter season that's why the sun set early and it was really cold at night when the sudden gushes of wind blew.

After settling down on our rooms, we planned to walk out for dinner and contemplated on what to wear for that evening not knowing how cold it could get at night. My stubborn bf thought he could bear the 'air-con' temperature and wore only a pair of shorts and sandals instead of jeans and shoes as we walked from our hotel to the renowned 西门町. In the end, he suffered numb toes and shivered each time the cold wind blew against us.. haha.

We ended up having dinner at Shilin night market. All of us were famished by the time we reached there so we ordered all kinds of local food - oyster omelette, beef steak, my fav crispy chicken and mushrooms, completed with the " 青蛙下蛋”jelly drink.

Day 2

We were supposed to wake up early the next morning to join a half day city tour that was included in the package. But in the end, we got up late and were greeted by half a bus full of other tourist who had been waiting for us. I was too embarrassed to look at them and scuttled to the back seats where i put on my shades and went back to sleep again throughout the 1hr30mins journey to Wu Lai Hot Spring.

At the hot spring resort, we were allocated private rooms to enjoy a 30mins session. I was quite disappointed though when i first saw the room - it was nothing like those hot spring spa overlooking natural view. It fact it looked like a normal bathroom with 2 tubs - 1 for near-freezing cold water, the other for scaling water as high s 60 degree celsius. We were supposed to soak in the hot tub then cool off in the cold one. (There were specific instructions given by the tour guide on how long to stay in each tub but i did not pay any attention to him so i just soak in each tub for as long as i could withstand the hot/cold.)

Being too bored by just soaking in the sulphurous water, me and darling played scissors papers stone -Winner in hot tub, loser in cold tub for 10 seconds.. =P It was hilarious to see each other jumping around in the cold tub helplessly.. haha...

For the rest of the day we shopped around Ximending. My loot included a thick coat, a pair of boots, leggings and some 'bling blings'. Being satisfied, we headed for the traditional Ah Zhong mee sua before returning to our hotel to freshen up and change into our party wear. It was Christmas eve that day and we our intention was to party our night away in one of their hottest nightclub - LUXY.

The local tour guide told us earlier that Taiwanese do not celebrate Christmas and so it wouldn't be a public holiday for them the next day. Ha..but clearly, the crowd gathered at the club that night certainly did and knew how to celebrate christmas indeed! Who cares about having to work the next day anyway.The DJ /singers and handsome dancers made the atmosphere so high that everyone (including me) was screaming and dancing like the devils!! Haha..

Day 3 - Shopping at Wu Fen Pu / Shilin Night Market / Taipei 101

Day 4 - Hello Kitty Cafe

Before we set on the trip, i kept bugging darling that i have to go to the Hello Kitty cafe while we are there. True to his words, he brought me to this cutest ever cafe! The sight of the big pink Hello Kitty sign was enough to make me all excited like a little gal..(Hello kitty used to be my fav character till Marie cat came along) and i was totally mesmorized by the arrays of neatly arranged delicately-made kitty cupcakes on display. How could anyone bear to eat such a cute piece of artwork? I imagined if the cupcake was truely placed before me, would i have the heart to pierce through the cute kitty face looking up at me? Anyway, i did not have a chance to know the answer because we had to be on the waiting list and wait approx 1hr in order to get in. Much as i'd like to wait, the others doesn't seem as keen. So in the end, we only took pictures outside and i left reluctantly... (i'll go back to the cafe the next time i visit Taipei and make sure i get in there, i swear.)

Day 5

Not wanting to waste our last night, we shopped till almost 2am when the shops at Shilin closed before dragging our tired feet and heavy loots back to the hotel to pack. The car would be waiting at the hotel by 4am to send us to the airport.. that means we had only aboout 2 hrs to pack and shower, with no time to rest. Tired.

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Wow.. it took me 6 hrs just to get this post done with pictures and all. My darling is sleeping beside me now, torturing me with his snore symphony.. keke.. I guess it's his way of telling me i've neglected him and he's bored.

Off to disturb him now and hope i'll have time to do my long due Valentines' day post soon..

My first blog!!!

2009-02-28T18:57:00.000+08:00

After so many trials and errors, i finally managed to settle on the template outlook and post my first blog! (There are actually a few more items: Links and Tagboard..to be added. But im leaving these to some other time.) Phew! I've been meddling around with the HTML codings for sooo long.. and to think i actually scored 'A" for Java programming during my Poly days. What a shame..

I've been thinking of setting up a blog years back but due to my 三分钟 nature, i've been putting it off again and again.. haha.. but TADAH! Finally here it is now - my personal space to keep a chronicle of my life, my thoughts and my feelings!

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Im feeling so dead beat tired today - only slept 3 pathetic hrs in 2 days!!!

Woke up yesterday morning around 9.30am to meet Bro, Sis and her date to go K-lunch. It was actually a spontaneous decision made on fri night when Sis said she was going k-lunch with a 'friend'. Out of fun, i told her that me and Bro would like to tag along and meet this this guy friend of hers and surprisingly, they were both game enough to have our company. So there we were - our first outing with her friend. Fortunately, it turned out to be a pleasant experience for us~ =)

At night was KTV session with darling and his friends again.. and since i already sang in the afternoon, i spend most of my time listening to this gal - who happened to be the birthday gal yesterday, singing as though it was her live concert. I guess she still didnt know she had pissed others off by keep inserting her songs and sang them in a row though there were more than 10 of us in the room waiting for our songs! In the end, we threw in our towels to her marathon singing and left early.. but she stayed, under the obliged companion of her bf and continued to sing.. Haha.

After leaving the 'concert', we had supper and carried on with our next program - MJ session at 4am in the morning! 5 straight rounds and 12 hrs later at 4pm this afternoon, me and darling finally headed home - $270 poorer. Though Darling did not say anything, i could feel that he wasnt happy that i even agreed to play in the first place but he still gave in. Thanks baby.. i really appreciate everything you did for me - sleeping on the small sofa as i played, bought lunch for us and waited for me when we wanted to play another round, split the loss with me and finally send a zombie-me home to slp.

It was pouring this afternoon when i slept.. but despite the thunder & lightning outside, the heavy raindrops smashing against the window, i slept peacefully in Darling's embrace. His strong arms held me close to him for protection and his body gave me warmth. It felt so gd and comforting in his embrace im sure i was smilling in my sleep. =)

When i woke up 3 short hrs later, i felt an overwhleming surge of love for this man sleeping beside me. The first thing i did was to kiss him lightly and told him how much i love him.. sweet sweet feeling i had. It's amazing how love can feel so simple and heartwarming at that moment.